Huge head

I don't know if you ever noticed but I have a huge head.  I don't mean that I'm arrogant.   Maybe that can the be subject of another post, and whole lot of soul searching, but I mean it literally.  It's huge, a virtual planetoid (to quote Mike Meyers).   I love hats too, but the truth is that I have a hard time finding hats that really fit my enormous melon.  Sophia has a big head too.  In fact on those rare occasions that I find a hat that fits my huge noggin it fits her too.  We share everything.  Yesterday in birthing class we saw a video of a woman who ended up having a c-section because the baby's head was too big to fit through the pelvis.  The whole time I'm thinking, "Damn I hope Sophia has a huge pelvis."  Check out these pictures and judge for yourself how big the baby's head is.   

Alarm!!!!!!!!!

In case you were unaware the wife and I and our two cats are moving this summer.  It's going to be hard leaving behind our lovely one bedroom apartment, with it's huge basement, and huge kitchen, and new appliances, and psychotic fire alarm system.  All year it has been our nemesis.  At first it hated pizzas.  Any attempt to bake a pizza was met with a deafening siren whitch automatically calls the fire department.  "Damn, I guess we'll have to stop baking pizzas!"  I said.  But noooo.  That wasn't the end of it.  Then it started going off even when we preheated the oven.  The fire alarm made war on all baking.   Not to be discouraged we developed a strategy, that involved openning all the windows, putting a fan in the kitchen window, and covering the smoke detector with a shower cap, turning the lights out and pretending no one was home.  Then in the darkness of our kitchen we would try to fool our evil fire alarm into ignoring our culinary efforts.  This was only met with mild success.  I began to tire of telling the firemen who kept having to come to our house in full gear that "I swear I didn't really burn anything, it's just the alarm, it's crazy I'm telling you it's out to get me."  As the weather warmed a new day dawned in the war against the smoke detector.  We bought a grill.  "Haha" I thought.  "I'll cook outside.  Take that stupid fire alarm."  I was momentarilly struck with horror the first time I tried to light it and saw the pillar of smoke heading toward an open window.  There is little that can be done to disuade a plume of smoke from heading in it's desired direction no matter how much flailing of the arms one attempts.  Thinking quickly I wheeled the smoking grill to a new location farther from the house and at an angle wherefrom the smoke would drift by the house rather than directly into it.   I had won the battle but the war was not over. This last week the dastardly device has countered by going completely insane.  Now it just goes off whenever the hell it feels like it, each time with the same deafening wail and obligatory appearance of the fire department to inform us that yes indeed there is no fire.  "No kidding?"   I can't wait to move.